Starting Fresh ...

The number 40 has some significance in the Judeo-Christian traditon:

Noah and his crew endured 40 days and 40 nights of rain,

the Israelites wandered in the desert for 40 years,

the spies explored the promised land for 40 days,

Jesus fasted in the wilderness for 40 days and 40 nights,

and Jesus' moved among us for 40 days after the resurrection.

40 is an important and perhaps Holy number.

.

40 years ago I began my life's journey,

40 years ago my father turned 40,

40 years ago my father died,

.

This year, my 40th,

we mark the 40th Anniversary of my father's death.

.

Last week thanks to the help of a friend's challenge,

I realized the need to break free of the story that has defined me.

"Create a new story ..." they said.

And so I will ...

-

This year, as I note the presence of many 40s,

I'm turning the page and starting a new story

on a fresh page ...

... things will not suddenly get "ALL BETTER"

nor will I be able to wave a magic wand

and make all of the hurt and pain of the past just go away,

but in recognizing and accepting the presence

of this story ... I diminish it's power over me.

.

This year, a year marked with the HOLY Number of 40,

I start fresh - I focus my attention,

not on the past,

not on what has been,

not on the story that has been,

but on THIS MOMENT.

I focus on the NOW,

and become present to my life in THIS moment,

and no longer let my 40 year old story define me.